Pain and suffering are always inevitable for a large intelligence and a deep heart.
Sometimes we do foolish things that cause ourselves unnecessary pain. We goes against our own rules, plans and unspoken goals and end up acting inappropriately. To get back on track and trying to forget is mostly the way forward. But how many times do we have to go against ourselves to succeed?
Today is dedicated to be happy. That’s what matters and everything else must wait. My urge to escape is gone. A sudden desire to find a clarification is breaking my thoughts. My mind is controlled by a mode that moves towards a new opening. A desire to solve life’s big questions about simply being determines my actions. We live in a complex world where one thought occupies the other. Our actions are reflected by our thoughts. We ask questions, makes rules and boxes for how to live, act and be. Today I let all this pass by and concentrate on the joy, focusing on what I have.
There’s nothing more beautiful than a confidant woman who knows her own strengths and weaknesses. The focused look and the strong backbone that makes her immortal. The woman where there is no uncertainty stored in the eye. The woman who are targeted and fighting for her goals – deadly inspiring and admirably.
Sleepless I turn on the coffee machine. Another night where the inspiration and dreams has taken over and sleep wasn’t an option. Another day where I must realize that I’m not satisfied – a feeling of being stuck in the system pulls a black shadow over my otherwise positive mind. It drains me.
In November I’ll be like:
A self-absorbed young lady trying to find herself and her well-being.
A low slender girl in big sweaters.
The type who prefers the early hours in bed.
The girl who spend a fortune on coffee and have deep conversations with her girlfriends.
The happy and grateful girl who is sufficiently drunk on the way out with her friends.
The kind of girl where all the bitches are thinking – how can this girl be so self-absorbed, always thinking and writing about herself. And I’ll be like – so what? If I can not be self-centered in my own life, where can I?